Work

I'm not sure why, but every time I see a new schedule posted at work, I feel almost claustrophobic. I can't think of a better way to describe it, but that's pretty much the feeling I get. I can't figure out why this happens. It's not a bad thing to see next week's hours, it's useful. Then I know what's going to happen.

I've always had this fear of not being able to relax, though. It probably comes from the fact that I relax too often. But it's the same with school... I'm terrified of my life becoming purely university next year. I want to have fun, to be able to sit by myself or with my friends. Maybe it's the same way with work. I'm afraid that I'm going to be spending all this time just cooking fries.

But I got a paycheque today. That was nice.

I'm weird. With the hours that I'm working, there's no way my life would just be cooking fries. And I'm always worried about Steve and I having stupid hours and having trouble seeing each other, but in the back of my head I know that won't happen. Which brings me to my next thought about working full-time next summer, or else I'll starve. And the dilemma of wanting to work during school so that I'm not calling my mom for money every so often. But can I deal with that?

I made a calendar website that has my hours and Erik's hours on there. It's mostly for my family to use so that they can plan things around us working (that always causes trouble for them, and when I tell them hours, they forget 5 minutes later). If you guys want to use it for whatever reason, go ahead. The link is to the right. It's not a pretty calendar, but it does its job.