In these past two years, I learned a lot, and I've grown because of it. I think I've come a lot closer to being the type of person that I'll be for the rest of my life - the adult I'll become and always be.

In these past two years, I learned about people. I learned that there is one person out there that has the ability to completely restore your faith in all people. I learned that there is someone who will always believe in you, even if you're not heading in the right direction. There is someone out there that sees true beauty in your flaws, but can still appreciate what you like about yourself. I learned that this person can amaze and surprise you every day, and it could never become redundant. This person can make anything feel better, no matter what.

Sometimes these things seem so unreal or impossible. But in these past two years, I learned that it's all true.

And above all, I learned that I am capable of these exact things.

I love you, darling, with all my heart.

University

I'm worried because a bunch of people are getting accepted into programs already, but I haven't heared anything at all. I'm so paranoid of not getting into anywhere.

Holidays

I can't decide whether or not Valentine's Day is important. Yes, it's commercial and silly to be told what day you're supposed to 'love' someone, but still, it's Valentine's Day.

Even if I do have someone to celebrate it with, I still don't like that day. It confuses me.

I was hoping it'd be better

I thought that the change to a new semester would make things a little better, but it's already too hard and stressful to deal with.

I'm feeling defeated so often now. I keep thinking that I must've been kidding myself when I thought I was capable of all of these things. Sometimes it's bad to have too much faith in yourself, because it doesn't help anything along. I really think that I'm trying, but my trying isn't good enough, and sometimes it can't be helped.

Giving up isn't something I do, but my options are running low.

Bored, lonely...

Things change - that's what I'm told.

But how come I'm just watching it all change around me? How come I'm not changing with the rest of them?